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Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself
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Original price was: $30.00.$2.99Current price is: $2.99.
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AN INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER
A JANUARY 2024 APPLE BOOKS STAFF PICK AND AUDIBLE EDITORS SELECT
NAMED A BEST BOOK TO READ THIS JANUARY BY THE GLOSS
A JANUARY 2024 APPLE BOOKS STAFF PICK AND AUDIBLE EDITORS SELECT
NAMED A BEST BOOK TO READ THIS JANUARY BY THE GLOSS
A raw and unflinching look at the objectification and misogyny of the Playboy mansion, a woman’s stolen young adulthood and her journey to self-acceptance, and a rare look inside Hugh Hefner’s final days.
At just twenty-one years old, Crystal Harris’ life changed forever when she attended a party at the notorious Playboy mansion. Picked out of the crowd by Hugh Hefner, she became one of his infamous “girlfriends,” attending glamorous Hollywood parties and traveling the world. Yet this seemingly alluring lifestyle had a dark side. Hef controlled his girlfriends with strict rules regarding everything from their hair and makeup to their curfews, and Crystal was forced to compete with other women for her spot in the highly hierarchal system. Living at the mansion, she felt more like a fixture than a resident.
She quickly rose to the top, but being Hef’s number one girlfriend came at the cost of Crystal’s identity outside her role in the Playboy universe. Her fate seemed sealed when Hef surprised her with a marriage proposal she could not imagine refusing. But as Crystal Hefner, she grew increasingly restless to understand who she truly was away from what she saw as Playboy’s toxic culture.
In ONLY SAY GOOD THINGS, Crystal offers a vulnerable and clear-eyed look at how her experience with Hugh Hefner catalyzed her transformative journey from someone who prized external validation over all else to a person who finally recognizes her true worth. This candid memoir provides a fascinating look behind the scenes at a powerful cultural icon and brand, and an equally empowering perspective on hard-won lessons about who we allow to determine our value.
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Categories: Women Writers
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Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself
Price:
Original price was: $30.00.$2.99Current price is: $2.99.
Tori –
Very quick read. The entire first half, maybe even the first 3/4ths is information we already know from shows, podcasts, and other exposes. She should have done this book 3-4 years ago to get a jump on everybody else.
I do appreciate her sharing her story, though. Just like everybody has the right to do. I just expected it to be different for some reason, based on how it was marketed to me.
The last bit about the end of her time at the mansion and Hef’s death was interesting. I was curious to know a bit more about her life now but the story didn’t go that far. The photos at the end were a nice touch. I wanted to see more!
Her story seems to co-sign everything all the other women have said.
Ashley B –
I will be completely honest, I was not sure about this book, I saw it was on sale, and normally, I would be all in, but this time, I paused. Was this book for me? If I buy it, I am all in, and I am going to finish it, but would it keep my attention?
I bought it so I was all in and let me tell you, it did not disappoint. You always wonder how real someone is going to be, how open will they be, will they breeze bad the unhappy moments? Crystal lets it all out and leaves it on the page.
I will admit I was most interested in the runaway bride. She left, she came back but why? As you read this book, it only becomes more of a question. Is there a clear answer? I don’t want to give anything away.
This book went from an can I get through this book to I can not pit this book down, which is always a sign of a good book for me.
I would 100% recommend this book. It is not a fluff piece of how great playboy is. There are real opinions and real feelings.
Sophie –
So sad to hear what she endured. I believe her but there is always the question why she stayed so long. she was used but she also used Hef – she liked the bucks. Still my heart goes out to her and many like her. They were exploited and used given their youth and naivete. And coming from broken homes. Hef would zero in on beautiful women who were young and dumb and most of all who had serious like problems (daddy issues, from trailer homes etc.) whom he could exploit. I do feel for her.
Jenny –
This book is amazing. It’s so powerful I don’t yet have words to describe it fully or explain in depth how it has affected me. It’s raw, sad, yet beautiful. It’s a story about survival, self discovery, struggle, and so much more. I especially related to the struggles of a woman being objectified and the anger/hurt it causes. I can relate to the desire to be seen for more than what I look like. I think everyone, regardless of gender identity, could benefit from Crystal’s story. It’s funny I don’t know her but I feel so proud of her for sharing her story in this way and the journey she has made.
I wish I could know Crystal in real life because she has a beautiful soul!
Viveken –
I did not expect to like this or find any harsh truths revealed, but I was wrong. Crystal Harris’ book is a very kind and gentle FU to all of us who asked why a 21 yr old would date a powerful 81yr old, instead of asking why an 81yr old predator would parade and manipulate a bunch of 20yr olds for decades of personal entertainment purposes without any public repercussions. Because we all acted as if that was weirdly acceptable.Holly Madison clearly told us Hefner was a controlling narcissist who traumatized many. Bridget M. apparently was too kind or delusional to ever fully acknowledge all of it. Kendra W. seemingly preferred to rewrite history instead of admitting how easily one can harm oneself and others by being both youthfully ignorant and traumatized. A whole micro cosmos at the Playboy mansion and a gawping audience supported an unhealthy environment for girls looking for a lucky break. Crystal Harris frank description of her own bad choices reminds us how society treats young women and rewards both awful behaviour and female submissiveness. We live in a world that pretends prostitution is not prostitution if it is glamorized, while blaming victims for their survival tactics or their misguided ambition and quest for validation. Until we teach our daughters their self worth and what is acceptable male behaviour today, until then we are enabling the disrespect that causes girls to think they have to play stupid games and accept stupid prizes.
norman rambow –
I have found this book by Crystal H to be one of sincerity and trials. I liked the easy read however, I find that in her life of desired dreams there are disappointments that come with them.. She has an excellent way of explaining her beginnings and some trials that she faced.. The loss of her father, a love, some embarrassing moments, her desire to be better. A Great Book to read… For those ladies who have dreams it is comforting to know its not all roses.. and sometimes when you aspire to what you want.. It comes with a price… Maybe not quite what you wanted.
A good read.. Thanks Crystal
Nancy –
Great insight into life was like with Hugh Hefner. Very easy read and definitely keeps your attention. Sad story …but happy in the end for Crystal. Thanks for sharing.
Disgruntled janice –
I started off having great sympathy with Crystal and almost went along with the ‘victim’ scenario. However, having ‘run away’ and then returned to the Mansion and Hugh Crystal loses some credibility and in some ways shows elements of narcissism in her own behaviour, by only seeing things from her own perspective. It was a really good read though and gave insight into a world of excess on all levels and how people get drawn to glitz and glamour and wealthy trappings, but there is always a payback, ‘their soul’
Ava Courtney Sylvester –
Wow! I didn’t know what to expect from this memoir, having only known what Girls Next Door and the pages of Playboy portrayed Crystal as. But once I started reading her memoir, I couldn’t stop, not even getting up from my seat until I’d finisher it.
This is an astonishingly insightful, heart-rending story of love and loss, from the devastating death of her father at age 12 to losing her first love shortly after high school and, most devastating of all, losing herself. As part of her story, Crystal paints a nuanced portrait of Hugh Hefner, one that cones across as touching and devoted, even when she finally frees herself to say more than just “only good things.”
The part that got to me most was Crystal’s allegorical anecdote about the lovebirds. Slight spoiler alert: Hugh Hefner kept a pair of lovebirds who spent their days locked away in a cage, hidden away in his bathroom. Lovebirds mate for life. Yet one by one, they died, and one by one, the mansion staff would replace them, shoving a new bird into the cage and forcing the grieving parrot to share its quarters with a stranger. Eventually, the mansion staff stopped bringing in new birds, and the cage lay empty. Crystal later uncovered the cause of all the deaths: the bead in the water bottle feeder got stuck, so the poor birds died slowly of thirst, locked away as pretty little things, ornamental decorations caged where no one bothered to show them the slightest bit of care. Taken at face value or as metaphor for the women of Playboy, this just shatters my soul.
I hope that her journey from here leads her to the love and acceptance she’s been searching for all this time.
Shamp04 –
As a child of the 90’s I grew up with the “ideal” image of women being those on the cover of Playboy magazine. I had no idea that fake breasts, faker smiles, and shame were all stuffed into a size 0. Crystal’s story is insightful and eye opening, it is one we should read and take care to pass along to the next generation of women so that they may understand their worth isn’t measured in bra sizes or fat deposits. Perfection is an illusion, one given to us by an imperfect society.
Iris –
Ich bin entsetzt. Achtung Spoiler. Es war wirklich schlimm zu lesen, wie diese jungen Frauen in einem Harem gehalten wurden unter dem Deckmantel der Freiheit der körperlichen Liebe. Die hatte wohl nur Hugh Hefner, er hat junge, unfertige Persönlichkeiten eingefangen, er hat seine Macht schamlos ausgenutzt. Eine der schlimmsten Szenen ist, wie er Crystal über Leibwächter an der Flucht hindert oder sie noch nicht mal fragt, ob sie überhaupt mit einer Verlobung einverstanden ist. Spinnt der Typ? Sprachlos bin ich auch darüber, dass sie keine Bezahlung für die Serie erhielten und um Geld betteln mussten. Moderne Sklaverei. Das Buch ist recht schonungslos, und durch die eigene Schonungslosigkeit und Analyse sich selbst gegenüber ein lesenswertes Buch.
Ruby –
I will admit that I had judged Crystal a while ago… I feel bad to say that as I usually am one who always tells people that we should never judge someone else as we never know what someone else is going through. This book proves that… rather strongly.
I had absolutely no idea that Crystal struggled as much as she actually did with her own sense of beauty. To so many, she would have looked like she was beautiful, and would surely have known it, yet the actual reality was far from it. The fact that the unattainable so-called beauty standards had the impact that it had on Crystal should surely serve as some wake-up call for others… Society needs to be fixed as it is causing so much damage and hurt for people.
As for the actual reality of the Playboy Mansion, I had picked up on bits and pieces of it here and there before, however this book describes everything in a way that I would suspect would not have entered most people’s heads before. I used to watch a certain show associated with it many years ago but I didn’t suspect even then what the actual truth would be. (This was long before Crystal was there.)
I feel that she was rather strong to put this book out there and that is not meant in a nasty way. It is due to the amount of vilyifying that tends to accompany some books that I wouldn’t be surprised if Crystal ended up receiving. Simply because that is what some people seem to like doing. I had no idea that she actually does what she does now and that has given her even more respect in my eyes. For someone to try to show truth about something that is paraded as being “normal” they are always in for a rough time yet she has willingly gone for that. It seems that it all comes from a very good place ~ simply that she doesn’t want other girls to end up feeling the way that she did about herself and that is always something to be applauded. Thank you.
Once I begun reading, I ended up sitting and finishing it in one go as I simply had to find out what happened next. The lovebird scenario was very telling indeed. Her feelings regarding Hef were very well written and read as being very genuine to me. It sounds as though she did genuinely care for him ~ more so than what some others did. The fact that she has not attempted to paint herself a certain way also serves to prove this impression to me. She tried to protect him when so many were taking advantage. The revelation about the stealing that had been going on actually shocked me and it takes a lot to shock me these days. I do wonder who it was and for how long it had been happening for. At least she didn’t tell Hef. It seems as though she was protective towards him which was what he actually needed ~ someone who would actually look out for him and have his best intentions at heart instead of so many who simply wanted material things. At the same time, this was obviously to her own detriment… I wish Crystal all the best and I will be following her work from now on. I feel bad for having judged her previously as doing so is not nice to do particularly in a society when women are always pitted against one another. Thank you for doing what you are doing and for what you have done.
Nicholas Andrews –
Really interesting book – obviously tough to read at times but overall I enjoyed it and felt like it was well written