NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A deeply moving memoir of illness and recovery that traces one young woman’s journey from diagnosis to remission to re-entry into “normal” life—from the founder of The Isolation Journals and a subject of the Netflix documentary American Symphony
ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR: The New York Times Book Review, The Washington Post, Bloomberg, The Rumpus, She Reads, Library Journal, Booklist
“I was immersed for the whole ride and would follow Jaouad anywhere. . . . Her writing restores the moon, lights the way as we learn to endure the unknown.”—Chanel Miller, The New York Times Book Review
“Beautifully crafted . . . affecting . . . a transformative read . . . Jaouad’s insights about the self, connectedness, uncertainty and time speak to all of us.”—The Washington Post
In the summer after graduating from college, Suleika Jaouad was preparing, as they say in commencement speeches, to enter “the real world.” She had fallen in love and moved to Paris to pursue her dream of becoming a war correspondent. The real world she found, however, would take her into a very different kind of conflict zone.
It started with an itch—first on her feet, then up her legs, like a thousand invisible mosquito bites. Next came the exhaustion, and the six-hour naps that only deepened her fatigue. Then a trip to the doctor and, a few weeks shy of her twenty-third birthday, a diagnosis: leukemia, with a 35 percent chance of survival. Just like that, the life she had imagined for herself had gone up in flames. By the time Jaouad flew home to New York, she had lost her job, her apartment, and her independence. She would spend much of the next four years in a hospital bed, fighting for her life and chronicling the saga in a column for The New York Times.
When Jaouad finally walked out of the cancer ward—after countless rounds of chemo, a clinical trial, and a bone marrow transplant—she was, according to the doctors, cured. But as she would soon learn, a cure is not where the work of healing ends; it’s where it begins. She had spent the past 1,500 days in desperate pursuit of one goal—to survive. And now that she’d done so, she realized that she had no idea how to live.
How would she reenter the world and live again? How could she reclaim what had been lost? Jaouad embarked—with her new best friend, Oscar, a scruffy terrier mutt—on a 100-day, 15,000-mile road trip across the country. She set out to meet some of the strangers who had written to her during her years in the hospital: a teenage girl in Florida also recovering from cancer; a teacher in California grieving the death of her son; a death-row inmate in Texas who’d spent his own years confined to a room. What she learned on this trip is that the divide between sick and well is porous, that the vast majority of us will travel back and forth between these realms throughout our lives. Between Two Kingdoms is a profound chronicle of survivorship and a fierce, tender, and inspiring exploration of what it means to begin again.
Luc Proulx –
What a wonderful book, written with a lot of courage, honesty and love. Cancer is not an easy subject to share, but the author did it with ease and I would read anything she writes!
millie –
I’ve lost good friends to cancer. Reading this book, I realized that I never understood the emotional side of the disease. It drew a line in the sand marking those whose life must change from those still free to make choices.
I loved the way this author chose her words, explained her relationships, shared her experiences. She has certainly changed the way I look at those with cancer. Hopefully I’ll have more compassion.
Elaine H Stewart –
Certainly held my interest throughout the journey she took. Well worth the read of a lady through her journey with leukemia.
Mumra –
I used to work for the Anthony Nolan Bone Marrow Trust and met many families and patients waiting for transplants. My own daughter had a heart /lung transplant. I just wish I had read this book before I started work with ANBMT and then a mum of a transplant daughter.
This book should be on prescription along with the medication.
The honesty and reality of the author’s situation is described in such a way that it doesn’t make you cry but think…and for me that was a powerful revelation, not just thinking… but thinking differently about a person’s future life and recovery.
Everyone, at some point, will come across a person, or be that person in the throes of a life threatening condition.
If they have read this book then they will have a better understanding of how to deal with it. Please read this book for everyone’s sake
Jordan E. –
I hated the first 30 pages of the book, but the remainder was good enough to warrant 5 stars. The author initially flits from event to event, presenting not so much the life of a human being as a collage of substance use and poor choices in overly flowery language. After that, the language cools down and she starts to recount actual experiences.
I won’t pass judgement on the author for her background or treatment of others – much of this book is her journey of coming to terms not only with her own suffering, but with the suffering of those around her, much of it caused by her, either directly or indirectly. That’s much of the beauty in this book – the author is able to admit her own shortcomings and face, if haltingly and poorly, the suffering of her situation. Can we ask any more of the grossly imperfect, selfish, and ignorant people that we all are? She was certainly fortunate in many ways, but she also acknowledges this, and talks many times about people she encountered who were far less so – the families of her now-deceased friends, for one. This was a moving book, that didn’t try to be an uplifting postcard, and did a good job reckoning with the ultimately terrible reality of life.
I have one gripe – the author says she wouldn’t undo her diagnosis if she had the chance. That’s against the spirit of the rest of the book, and honestly reckoning with the horror of existence. In the words of Viktor Frankl, suffering can be meaningful, but many other things can be meaningful, too. If suffering can be alleviated, then the meaningful thing to do is to remove the suffering. I promise life is full if disappointments and meaning and loss and deep relationships even without cancer.
Dream Catcher –
Suleika wrote her heart out. Her writing style is simply beautiful. Very intelligent girl. As I was reading every page I felt her pain and courage. Her will to live is tremendous. Her luck was lousy, because she got the leukemia but her luck was also fantastic because she had a wonderful man to love her, take care of her during her horrible struggles. She was a bit selfish to Will, he did everything he could, withstood a lot of her horrible treatment procedures was by her side for a long time, until it became too much. She went on by herself and made it. Once she went to remission, she decided to hit the road across America. Read the book to see why. Her road trip across America was way to hard on her body. She had just finished her horrible treatments and hit the road all alone in a used car. Brave you might say, but thoughtless I say. Very dangerous. She made the trip as a brand new driver to boot. Then she decides to stay in a cabin, again alone in the woods, no phone no nothing, again, risky. She took many chances, then the disappointment of a return of this monster that has been eating her all this time. She gets together with another wonderful man, an angel if you ask me.
Jon Batiste , a great composer and fantastic musician, who loves her dearly. Again her lucky star came through. But the monster within her woke up. It started to eat her again, lucky she had her brother to give her a matching bone marrows twice. She survived both, she’s a survivor and a fighter. I admire her will. She’s a great young lady, she writes, she survives, and I wish her all the good luck she needs to pull her though this second time of hell. She has a great husband, she has life in her and the will to live which is strong. Her realistic chances are kind of low at 35% survival, but what do they know, she will prove them wrong again as only she can. I certainly wish her strength and power to beat this monster again. I admire her, really admire her. Please let her good luck take over, let her spirit guide lead her out of this illness,and let her live happily ever after and perhaps write another nice book. She’s such a beautiful girl. Jon and Suleika look great together. Love.
The Visual Corner –
Heart-touching and sincere. It’s been a while since I read a book that touched my soul like this one. It’s introspective, full of real-life wisdom, and inspiring at the same time. I cried, smiled, and dreamed thinking of what Suleika wrote and lived. It’s a book I will share for sure.
Juan Manuel Vasquez –
An amazing memoir, thought provoking, inspiring, full of insights. I highly recommended to anyone looking for motivation on how to live a richer life.
Edde Morgan –
I feel that the book really dives into what it is to be sick. The mental anguish seems to be as bad as the physical. Susu really paints a great picture with her words.
Amanda B. –
The quickest read and so inspiring. I also appreciate books that push me intellectually and expand my vocabulary – this is one of those. Go support Suleika and then watch Jon Batiste in concert 🙂